Product Placement

I was outside of Grand Central and saw a homeless guy sitting on the sidewalk. I quickly realized that he lost the bottom half of his legs. Just as I was thinking, "oh, man, poor guy. it would be really tough to survive NY without feet," then I saw that he had placed his artificial legs horizontally behind him. Right when I breathed a sigh of relief for him, I saw a man had set up a shoe-shine station literally right next to the homeless guy! Accident? I think not. I think the shoe shine guy should give the homeless guy a cut. Strong juxtaposition!

Doctor, Doctor!

I have a serious case WTF is going on?!

On Tuesday I was walking to an interview and all of a sudden encountered a cluster-f of barricades, cops, and people carrying the Chinese flag. For four straight blocks I had to sweet talk every police officer on the corner to let me cross the street. I knew I was near the UN but had NO idea what was going on.

Same story, different day. I was going to an interview on Wall St on Wednesday and right outside the NY Stock Exhange there were a ton of people, news stations, and a motorcade of black suburbans with tinted windows that sped off quickly.

I'm pretty sure the Rx will be to turn on the television and keep up with the news...

"A" for Effort

I was walking from Kinko's to the subway on 33rd and was basically avoiding this guy who was trying to talk to me. If you saw his orange vest and garbage can, you'd avoid him too. He kept offering to give me his business card. I finally acknowledged him and accepted his business card - it was a wrinkled HSBC post-it that had his name and number. As I walked away he shouted, "I'm really going to get a job there!"

Boots with the Fur

Tuesday was a pretty hot day here in NY. I happened to be sitting across a girl on the subway who was wearing an alleged dress (basically what a normal person would call a long t-shirt) and knee-high boots with fur (seriously). When she sat down her bare behind touched the subway seat (eew) and then she complained to her friend about how hot she was the whole ride. Disgusting!

Love/Hate

It's the end of day two in NY and I have a dichotomous relationship with the subway.

On one hand, it's totally functional and efficient- I can travel 30+ blocks in just a few minutes. Plus, it's way cheap. Not so bad...

On the other hand, omfg...Yesterday (Sunday) I was transferring at Union Square and actually had to wait longer than the usual minute for the next train (or at least it felt like a long time). It was probably about 100 degrees down there and there was this person playing really bad music. Really, really bad LOUD music. Within a short time I'd say about 70 people accumulated on the platform, desperately waiting for the train. We all exchanged looks that commonly translate to, "This is horrible. Somebody please tell him to shut up. Should we pay him to stop?" He sucked.

Then today I accidentaly got on a train with a very stinky homeless person. I should've known better than to get on a train that didn't have as many people as the next car. You know what they say about things that are too good to be true....lesson learned!

Biker Bash

I was on my way to the subway to see an apartment in Chelsea when I saw a bicylclist riding full speed down the street. A car driver accidentaly opened his door just in time - the poor bicyclist slammed into the open door. I was among 20 people on the street that stuck around for a minute to watch them yell at each other.

"I'm a Minimalist"

So, I have been stalking craigslist religously (pun to follow) for a sublet here in NY. I read a cool apartment description but the picture was a little unclear so I gave the person leasing the apartment a call. The conversation went something like this...

Me: Hi, I'm calling the about the furnished apartment on cragislist and have a few questions, blah, blah, blah. Is that a couch in the picture?

Leasor: Um, well it serves the same purpose as a couch.

Me: So what exactly is it?

Leasor: Well, I got it at an antique store.

Me: Mmmm hmmm...so what exactly is it?

Leasor: It's actually a church pew. You see, I'm a minimalist.


And that pretty much ended that conversation! I mean, can you even buy a church pew? Did this lady steal a church pew? How would one steal a church pew?

I'm a blogger

I thought it would be fun to document some of the "interesting" things that happen during my stay here in NY. You know, those sort of things that happen and you think, "only in New York." Well, maybe they can happen anywhere but it just might be fun to share....